Response to a question on letter writing by Muhammad Arshiyan Khan of Class O’ Levels. The question was: "Write a letter to a friend inviting him to be in your team to represent your school in a general knowledge competition."

Muhammad Arshiyan Khan of Class O’ Levels

Task

You have been chosen to represent your school in a general knowledge competition. You must choose one friend to be in your team.

Write a letter to your friend inviting him or her to be in your team. You must include the following points:

• When and where the competition will take place
• A request to your friend to join you in the team
• Why you think your friend is the best choice for your team
• What preparation you should both do
• Details of the prizes in the competition

Dear Obaid,

I hope you are having a pleasant winter break even though the snow is piling up. Since the school has been called off for a month none of us have (has) interacted with our teachers, but luckily I hooked on to Mr. James and enquired all the information regarding the upcoming district general knowledge competition we were told about. Mr. James said that Kwantlen College has been given the honors and will (…honors to host…) host the competition this time. He also told concluded that it will be a Friday the sixth, which is the week after the upcoming week (He also shared that it will be held on Friday, February 20, 2015).

I (have) heard that you were keen in (about) this competition (…competition, though luckily enough I’m the one who stood selected to represent our school).  I have given it a thought and it would be wonderful if you assisted me in the competition (would be wonderful if you could join me to be my team). You are an intelligent student and work hard too and (You are an intelligent and hard working student, so it would really be great to have someone like you by my side.) me being amongst the position holders we would make a great team. Obaid, I am pretty sure we can take home the award if go together. (….can take home the first prize if we join hands.)

The competition is not far so it would be excellent if we had a few days together and had a precise discussion on the whole matter. How about the upcoming weekend? Any day that is suitable for you, because I am not engaged in any activity and am bored at home any ways.

I forget to mention above that Mr. James also told me about the prizes and rewards of the competition (I can understand you must be waiting for the most exciting part of the story, that is, prizes. The competition is a big one and contenders are coming in numbers. They will give a ticket of two to Niagara fall as the reward which is worth it. The runner ups will receive a tour within the city. So, I am confident you will be a great asset and will be mindful to my request (….am confident that you will be delightfully ready to take a plunge).

Awaiting a fast and an enthusiastic response from your side

Yours sincerely, (Yours with love)

Muhammad Arshiyan Khan

Zaid Waris of class O’ Level’s response to a question on letter writing. The question was: "Write a letter to a friend inviting him to be in your team to represent your school in a general knowledge competition."

Task

You have been chosen to represent your school in a general knowledge competition. You must choose one friend to be in your team.

Write a letter to your friend inviting him or her to be in your team. You must include the following points:

• When and where the competition will take place
• A request to your friend to join you in the team
• Why you think your friend is the best choice for your team
• What preparation you should both do
• Details of the prizes in the competition

Dear Sohaib,

First of all, I seek apology for communicating this to you in such busy times of yours (It’s too formal. Make it sound informal.). May God help you in your ongoing academic exams. After all, as to explain my purpose for writing to you is to inform you that you that I stood selected by the school administration for inter-school general knowledge competition which is going the be held on the forthcoming Saturday, at the auditorium Allama Iqbal University, Islamabad. (As you will have finished your exams by the end of this week, it is high time to share with you about what we both can enjoy together. Firstly, be informed that I stood selected……..)

A team consists of three (two) Ordinary Level students. I wish you could be the part of our team. Because I and Armughan are not able to gather any more student for our team. So, we came to meet a single solution in the end; and that is to add you in our vacancy. Our selection for you is due to your vast experience in general knowledge competition as well as your good relations with Sir Hakan. (To be honest, when it comes to choosing someone to be my team, no one other than you popped in my head. It is due to your vast……..)

What we are going to do is quite meekly (…..is not something complicated), I am going to browse through the internet, and download and print each (bit of) relevant (information) to our subject as to memorize (so as to memorize) some of the general knowledge facts. Armughan is taking the responsibility to copy some general knowledge related facts from the university because his father is the (a) professor there. In the end (What all you have to do is) you just have to adjure (to request) Sir Hakan for some documents related to general knowledge. You could receive (If you could mange to grab) at least fifty (such) pages (from him, it would be an achievement) of information because he has got thousands of them.

We have got merely a week to prepare for the battle. There would be 16 teams to defend (to contest). You should (must) have been looking for the prizes throughout the letter. So, (So, here is the detail:) the third prize to the team  is Rs. 30,000 (the 3^rd prize winning team will get Rs. 20,000); second position team will receive Rs. 60,000(the one with 2^nd position will receive Rs. 35, 000) and the prize for the grand winners is Rs. 90,000 (and bumper prize for first position winning team is Rs. 50,000) will plus visit to USA for a week with the expenses paid (Not only this, it is coupled with one week visit to the US with all expenses paid).

I think you would not turn my request down (I am sure you will not turn my request down) and I am very serious for your participation (With you sitting by my side I’m sure to hit the 1^st prize). So, please do not aggrieve me by repudiating my request. I shall be waiting for your reply (I’m all eyes to see a positive response).

Yours very lovingly

Zaid Waris

Responding to a question on letter writing. See the response. First original draft, and then improved version of the same draft.

Letter to a friend inviting him to be in your team to represent your school in a general knowledge competition

Points to be incorporated:

·       When and where the competition will take place

·       A request to your friend to join you in the team

·       Why you think your friend is the best choice for your team

·       What preparation you should both do

·      Details of the prizes in the competition

Original Draft by the student (See improved version of this draft below)

Dear Sohaib,

I hope you’re doing good with God’s Mercy upon you. I’m doing good as well. There is a proposal I’d like to discuss with you. (You have read first paragraph; now first see the improved version below.)

I have recently been informed that I have been chosen for a general knowledge competition and I am representing our school. The competition is going to be held in Pak-China Friendship Center on Wednesday, 12^th of February, 2015 at 11 am sharp. There is an advantage they have given to every representative of the competition and that is that they can invite any one of their friends to join their team. You were the first choice that popped in my head. (You have read 2nd paragraph; now first see the improved version below.)

I have known you for 12 years and you’re of my oldest and best friends that have supported me in my every problem so I believe that you’ll stand shoulder-to-shoulder with me in this contest. Also you are very talented and knowledgeable so I think you’ll be a perfect choice for my requirement. (You have read 3rd paragraph; now first see the improved version below.)

I think for our preparation we can consult our school library. According to my knowledge, they have a wide range of very educational and instructive books that can help us in it. Apart from that I have some old books through which my cousin used to prepare for his CSS exam. I mean it can help us a lot too. I hope you also have some amazing ideas for our preparation. Do let me know if you do. (You have read 4^th paragraph; now first see the improved version below.)

Okay. Now for the best part of this competition; The Prizes. The winners will get $10,000 with Visa to spend their holidays in LA with full hotel package. They will get clearance to visit NASA as well. The prizes sound goo to me so I think you should join me in this. We have a good chance in winning this. (You have read 5^th paragraph; now first see the improved version below.)

I’m expecting your reply and I hope that you’ll take my invitation in your consideration. Thanks. (You have read concluding lines here; now first see the improved version below.)

Yours with love,

Shaaref Munir. (No full stop here)

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Improved Version of the Letter

Dear Sohaib,

I hope you’re doing well. Life is treating me fantastically well here. But this letter is not all about exchanging hello, hi; there is something exciting I’d like to share with you.

I really feel proud that I have been selected for a general knowledge competition to represent our school. The competition is going to be held in Pak-China Friendship Center on Wednesday, 12^th of February, 2015 at 11 am sharp. What’s more exciting is there is a wonderful facility they have offered to every contestant that they can make team with any one of their friends, meaning that one can participate either singularly or by making pair with a person of one’s own choice. Unsurprisingly, you were the first choice that popped in my head.

I have known you for 12 years and am fully aware and convinced of your strengths. Not only you’re my oldest and the most trustworthy fellow, but also you are the one who I find the most talented and knowledgeable in the realm of all my friends and acquaintances – no exaggeration here! So I am damn sure you’ll make a perfect choice for this battlefield and will prove yourself to be a knight.

As for preparation, we can consult our school library. To the best of my observation, our school library has a wide range of books on multiple subjects. Besides, it’s equipped with internet connected latest computers that can help access information from every nook and corner of the world within seconds. Apart from all this, I also have my own treasure of some old books. The significance of these books can well be understood by the fact that they were the actual source using which my cousin, Qasim, passed his CSS exam in flying colours. And last but not the least is your own ‘devil’s workshop’!

Now to stir up your feelings further, let me share with you the most exciting part of the story: the prizes offered. The winning team will be getting $3,000 coupled with a week long fully sponsored stay in Singapore. Isn’t it enticing enough? Second prize? To be honest, I have no interest in the second prize, since I have set my eyes solely upon the first one. I’m damn sure that with someone like you on my side, no one else can even dare think of grabbing the first prize. What’s left now? --- nothing else except for your willingness.

If all this sounds appealing to you, write me back quickly so that we could chalk out a whole plan towards how to go about our preparation.

Awaiting a positive response

Yours with love

Shaaref Munir