Rewriting on another story, paragraph by paragraph. As expressed before, some of my students happen to be at the stage where writing correct English is the main concern, let alone other important features of writing. Again, although I will not obsess with perfecting story hooks, a story needs to end. If it doesn't, then it is not complete. Something like this, for example, provides an ending. It’s my cute improvisation, one of many possibilities. (The writer's (student's) name is being held).

A Wintry Day

I woke up on a Sunday morning, from the deep warm sleep, as Hasan yelled cheerfully. He rushed straight to my bed and removed the most comfortable object of my winter life; my sheets and the quilt. That made me furious but I found myself guilty later when I was told by the little creature that we had a plan and today was fixed for that plan.

I woke up on a Sunday morning from a deep, warm sleep to the sound of my brother Hasan yelling cheerfully. He rushed straight to my bed and removed my sheet and quilt—the most comfortable objects of my winter life. That made me furious but I felt guilty later when I was told by the little boy that we had a plan and today and remembered my promise to him the night before.

Holding my yawn, I straightened to the bathroom door. Water could not flow through the top-hole. It had frozen maybe. Switching on the geyser, I headed to the front door. Me myself standing in the middle of the porch, snowy flakes showered onto me. The patterned winds blew from each of the directions, sending chills down my spine.

Suppressing a yawn, I moved to the bathroom and tried to wash my sleep away. Only, I discovered that the water wasn’t flowing through the tap. Perhaps it had frozen? Switching on the shower and finding that it, too, was not flowing, I headed to the front door. Once I opened it and stepped out onto the middle of the porch, I found myself surrounded by snowy flakes, blown in all directions by the wind, sending chills down my spine.

As not to get too cold or simply the breakfast was ready, I got myself back into the house. Sitting besides the fire after a hot bath, it was so pleasant. We gathered our stockings and of course, snowman's stockings too. Locking the main door, I exclaimed to my family, "lets go".

I rushed back into the house. Hasan and I lit the fire and sat beside it. It warmed the house and soon I found I was able to have a hot bath. It was so pleasant. After we had eaten breakfast, we put on our warmest stockings, ones perfect for moving in the snow.

Opening the front door, I exclaimed to my family, "Let’s go!"

There we were, on a small hill near the town. From there we could see that as if the whole town had drowned into the sea of ice. Crunching the snow beneath our boots, we advanced to the place where it was a little denser.

Our house was situated on a small hill not far from the town. From here, it appeared that the whole town was submerged in a sea of ice. We all rushed out into the snow, to a place where it was denser. I just loved the sound of the fresh snowfall crunching beneath our boots.

People from all groups of ages and stages were there, gathered on that slightly steep slope. Children were busy making their snowmen but most of them, especially boys, were preoccupied with the skirmish of snowballs. They would scream if they were successful in shooting somebody. Ducking and swinging around, some were trying to save themselves from the storm of snowballs.

We weren’t alone. People of all groups and ages were out on the hill, gathered on the slightly steep slope. Children were busy making their snowmen but most of them, especially boys, were preoccupied with the skirmishes of snowball attacks. They would scream each time they were successful in shooting somebody. Ducking and swinging around, some were trying to save themselves from the storm of snowballs. Only a few succeeded.

Not all the people were in the snow however, some sat next to the fires they had built and some were in the cafes nearby, enjoying every sip of their hot coffee. To keep ourselves busy too, we joined the game of snowballs. Later we got retarded and found a flat place to sit upon and build a snowman. At last we had some hot coffee too. In the evening, when we reached home, surprised to find out that the main gate's lock was broken.

Not all the people were in the snow however. Some sat next to the fires they had built and some were in the cafes nearby, enjoying every sip of their hot coffee. To keep ourselves busy too, we joined the game of snowballs. Later we got tired and found a flat place to sit down and build a snowman. At last we had some hot coffee too.

It was a perfect day, and I was happy Hasan had pulled me out of my bed. The only trouble that day, though came when we returned home. The main gate's lock was broken. We were so worried that someone had robbed our house, except we found nothing wrong. There was only one thing, which Hasan found as soon as he rushed in to investigate.

“A snowman!” he exclaimed. And indeed, it was the best snowman I had ever seen—and the best surprise to end the day.